I’ll admit that I am not the most patient of people. This will come as no surprise to most people who know me on a deeper level, and to those who don’t- you may be sitting there thinking to yourself, “No way, really?” Trust me, it’s true.
When I was much younger- someone very wise told me never to pray for patience, because you would find yourself tested to the max, and you know what- I have no doubt, that they’re right.
Sometimes though, things happen. We find ourselves in situations that will not only test our patience, but also test our resolve. Knowing that ‘not being patient’ will have a consequence. I know- We live in a world that has become so filled with instant gratification that patience has become a thing of the past. Truth is- I know that I definitely fall into some of the trappings of instant gratification world- which doesn’t always mesh well with the journey to patience.
Until non-patience has a price, as is my case now.
Another thing you may not know about me- is that I’m really stubborn. Granted, I like to call it ‘strong-willed’, which in some circles may be a horse of an entirely different color, but the truth is- they are one in the same. I’m open to ideas- and always open to learning, but when I have an idea, I want to be able to run with it- yesterday. (Enter lack of patience 101. haha) Yes indeed, stubbornness and lack of patience can be fast friends, until they are challenged- then look out!
I’m on the mend, but I’ve been unable to do almost anything. Now generally, I would love the quiet time and the ‘do nothing’ time- but what I’ve learned is that I don’t do ‘nothing’ well. Even when I’m sick, I still do my thing, so being forced to do nothing- (without consequences if I don’t listen) has been a huge lesson in patience.
The sun is shining- I have massive amounts of energy, and things do to- but at this point- rest is the order of the day- the only order of the day.
So I’ve learned to let go, which hasn’t been easy- and not without one temper tantrum, and a few days worth of tears. But it has been a huge gift on many levels. I’m learning (then again I’m always learning) to rely on other people- something I don’t necessarily do well.
I’m overwhelmed with gratitude for those whom I call my tribe- who have offered to come from near and far (literally) to be here for me. Truth is- in the grand scheme of things- this is minor, and shall pass, given time. It’s not serious, and for that, I’m beyond grateful.
I honestly couldn’t manage without Marcel, (at leat not without hiring someone). He’s been the ‘chief cook and bottle washer’, around here- taking care of everything. Cooking, cleaning, and even offered to feed me AND wash my hair. That’s definitely love times a thousand. I’m so appreciative of him- and this has also turned into a little learning experience for him with cooking. So it’s a good thing on many levels.
Patience- I’ve learned that isn’t such a bad thing after all, and my body is thanking me- on many levels.