Through The Tulips Words of 'Wiz'dom

I realized today that something is amiss with me these days. What, exactly, I haven’t been able to put my finger on, but I’m trying.

I would suspect that it’s a combination of a plethoria of ‘little things’, which have been sitting, unprocessed in this grey matter of mine, and have snowballed into something larger than it should be.

That alone should be enough- but instead, I’ve found myself falling prey to some pretty negative and destructive activities the last few days. Don’t worry, by destructive, I don’t mean I’m off drinking, doing drugs, participating in lewd sexual behaviour  or anything like that- but I’ve found myself being pretty negative, and by allowing the negativity to take root, it’s created other problems- or shall I say- I’ve allowed it to manifest in other areas.

I recognize this; which is the first step to working through it and correcting the problem. Now, I have to understand the ‘whys’ and go from there, plus take steps to prevent this from happening in the future.

We all have speedbumps, but it’s how we react to them that make the difference, and my reaction has been far from stellar. I’m only human, so flawed- but I have to be true to me, and get myself back on track- and I will do just that.

How? I’m not sure, but I will get there. You can bet on that- I won’t stay down for long. I’m not only determined, but extremely stubborn. I think I get that equally honest from both parents, whom I adore.

Even though I’m not feeling very ‘grateful’ at the moment, I know the importance of finding the little things in every day life to be grateful for. Even though I may not ‘feel’ grateful, I am.

My Gratitude List for April 18, 2009.
Today I’m Grateful For:

• A quiet evening home alone.
• Silence-
• Recognizing when things are amiss, and working to sort through.
• Cherry blossoms.
• Chococcino (Chocolate cappuccino)